Typically, I am not a fickle decision maker.

This is especially true when someone else is paying for the thing on which I’m deciding.

When it comes to spending my own money, however, I tend to be a bit obsessive about making changes to my routine, adding a new expense to the budget, or deciding on a major purchase.  It kills me, because, the longer I spend thinking about a decision, the less I trust myself.

But I think I may have discovered a solution to this problem:  Make the decision.  React.  Undo decision if reaction is more negative than positive.

Thank God we live in a 30-day money-back-guarantee world.

On Tuesday, John and I mutually ended a 6 year relationship with Verizon and committed to AT&T.  The decision was not made instantly, and most of it was out of my control.  John’s been flirting with AT&T for several months now as he’s building a business with nothing but Apple technology.  This is one expensive relationship which I fully support and plan to join at home as soon as possible.  The cell phone break up, however, has not been so stress free.

On principle, I hate AT&T.  I hate their customer service.  I hate their coverage.  I hate their website and its inability to be forthcoming about what is the best plan to fit my family’s needs.  I hate that their customer service representatives range from Johnny-On-The-Money-Saving-Spot to High School Dropout and that inevitably, whatever Johnny told you yesterday, is no longer available today and suddenly neither is Johnny.

However.

It turns out, for what we need right now, AT&T is cheaper than Verizon.  And, in all fairness, I hate Verizon, as a company, for all of the same above reasons.  The only difference is that I haven’t made any changes to my cheapest cell phone plan on Earth in 6 years, so I never have to deal with them.  And, because of the iPhone 4, the previous generation iPhone is currently $50 with an AT&T contract.  To John (and his business mind), this is a steal that he snatched up immediately.  My first (and entirely wrong) reaction was: “Why do you get all the fun toys?  That is not fair.”

What a stupid thought.  What a stupid thing to say.

Unfortunately, my husband agreed with me.

So I bought an iPhone and we signed a 2 year contract that will cost us $140 a month.  *GULP*

I called it a “business expense” and blinked exactly twice before signing the paper.

Then I went home.

I have been having mild to moderate to severe anxiety ever since.

My brain:

Can you really justify an extra $15 a month right now for a data-plan you may or may not need?  (Yes, probably.  That’s only $0.50 a day.  I’ll potty train Carter this summer and it will come out of our diaper budget.)  You have an iPod Touch that you rarely use.  What makes you think you’ll use the iPhone features if you don’t even use them on your iPod Touch?  (Good point.)  How often are you in an area that does not have Wi-Fi access where you could not live without the Internet?  (The park?)  Wait a minute.  What do you do all day?  Do you really need Internet access all the time no matter where you go?  What are you going to do, check your email?  How many emails did you receive in total last week?  (Not counting Groupon nor grocery store deals?  Four.)  Do you really want to be that available?  Do you really want to be that woman, checking her phone every 5 minutes like she’s so important(Oh God.  I hate that woman.  Is that what I would be?  Yes.  Yes it is.  And I hate her.  I’m not that important.  I don’t even have a desk job.  When I did have a desk job, my favorite thing about it was leaving everything on my desk when I left for the day and boasting of my ability not to do any work at home.  The most important things in my day haven’t even fully grasped fine motor skills, let alone the use of their fingers for things like typing.  In fact, any and all emergency situations would likely result from my lack of attention to them, the chances of which rise with the idea of portable Facebook.  Do I really want my children to associate me with a hand-held idiot box?  What kind of message am I sending?!)

And with that, my decision has been made.

I’ll be returning to AT&T tomorrow.

iPhone Anxiety
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6 thoughts on “iPhone Anxiety

  • Oh Claire. Fifteen dollars a month is NOTHING, yes NOTHING even for you who is not working right now. The iPhone can be so much more than a facebook/email-checker. Think of music, GPS, restaurant-advisor– wait? Who am I kidding? I’m talking about restaurant advice to a woman who most certainly would never eat out because it’s a sinful luxury.

    Claire, above all else, the iPhone is worth it for one enormous reason:

    Pocket-Boggler.

  • I completely understand your plight. I purchased a Droid a couple of days ago … and legitimately have no idea what I’m doing. I mean, a touchscreen keypad? Really? WTF is that? I don’t know how to operate this piece of machinery. HOWEVER. My mind is boggled at AT&T having a $15/month data plan! I’m still with Verizon and at $30 a month, I wonder, “What have you done?” Honestly, the main time I use it is during my planning at school. Don’t judge me. But sometimes, I just need to calm myself down by playing a game of Fruit Ninja or checking facebook (which is blocked on the computers at school … but only for teachers … not administration or anyone in the office … hmmmmmmmmmmmm …)

    Well. Give me about three more weeks. I will be journeying your way for conversation, wine, and general discussion of us being the same person. Oh, and for your INFINITE wisdom. And maybe to be entertained by your adorable children. That is all.

    1. Not only have I not returned it, but now the anxiety comes in the form of the fear of dropping it, scratching it, or having it stolen from my car. On the other hand, I’m surprised with the amount of self-control I’m developing and it does make me feel rich and powerful. So there’s that.

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